Resolution Schmesolution OR I want to be like Dolly Parton

I do not wish to have circus freak-show-caliber breasts; but it got you here, so I hope you’ll stay for a wee spell.

I’m not a resolution maker, per se. But I’m big on improvement. If you want to call it resolution making, or goal setting, so be it. 2011 was a silent rollercoaster ride for me personally. I’ve been taking stock and have made a short list of, well…some schmesolutions – some are basic things that I want to and feel confident that I can make more time for, and some are more noble developments within myself that I’d like to see grow, with a little less manure and a lot more sunshine:

1. Blog more.
‘Nuf said.

2. Make more soup.
Not just soup, but more dishes in general. There’s nothing better than cooking on a Sunday and having two or three go-to meals in the fridge that I can heat up quick during the week. I too often find myself reluctant to give up work time to prepare a real lunch and go running to the peanut butter jar with a spoon to get me by a few more hours. As a vegan in a mostly omni family, I tend to just throw together “whatever” rather than make nice meals for myself. So, ”make more soup” = make more time for my own tummy. Yeah.

3. Run more.



The last four years I’ve done a lot of long-distance walking and considered myself a bit of a sporadic jogger as well; but when I took on the 9-week Couch-to-5K challenge in September I realized just how much of a jogger I was not. The first week consisted of running & walking in 60-second intervals for 20 minutes. I thought it would be a breeze, that I could probably skip to week 2 or 3...It whooped my ass. I couldn’t even begin to imagine running spurts of 3 minutes, 10 minutes, 30!? But I kept going, religiously, figuring if this program didn’t work, I was just genetically unfit to run. It was my last ditch effort to grow some stamina. I had two pals in town doing the C25K as well. We kept tabs after each run, building each other’s confidence, exchanging helpful tidbits…from muscle fatigue to cold nipples to frustration on the lack of time before dusk. We ran our first official 5K together on Thanksgiving day. I’m now a runner, with firmer legs and a healthier heart and lungs. I'm so proud of myself and my friends. So, schmesolution: Increase my speed and distance…perhaps a 10K in 2012? Yeah.

4. Be nice.
Love. Patience. Acceptance. Forgiveness. It sounds like weed-puffing ideology, I know. I’ve never seen “Steel Magnolias” from beginning to end (and have no plan to, honestly) but I read somewhere recently a quote from it…perhaps in another blog…where Dolly Parton’s character says something to the effect of “I’d rather walk on my own lips than say something bad about another person.” I’m the first to scoff. Phhht. How ridiculous. What a simpleton. Who’s that honestly righteous? Right?.....right?

I’ve never been a very sympathetic person. I’m a believer in making our own beds and sleeping in them. But I’ve been bombarded with notions of late, loving lofty notions, in different forms, from various sources, that are working their way into my cold cold heart.

The first heart intruders…some dear friends, a reverend at our local Unitarian Universalist church and his wife. Our daughters are best friends, their stars first aligning 11+ years ago in our childbirth class. But that's another story.
The UU church's philosophy is love and community. Not fire and brimstone vs salvation, not self loathing vs self righteousness. Just love, acceptance of all beliefs and believers, and enjoyment and wonder of all things natural in this world. Well, at least that’s my take on it so far. This was a very new concept to me, having grown up in a Pentecostal vs Atheist household. However, I dug my heels in good. No organized religion for me ever again. Bah! Until I sat in the pew this fall for the first time and found my eyes brimming with tears through the whole sweet service. How comforting, how nostalgic, how healing. I’m not a regular yet by any stretch, but I think there’s something to be said for craving church instead of feeling burdened by it.

My best friend e-mailed me one Saturday asking if I’d like to go to a concert with her the next night…her daughter was sick; her husband had to stay home. I’d listened to a couple of The Avett Brothers tunes on YouTube previously, and they sort of put me to sleep, it’s true. So, I wasn’t expecting much from the concert, but was excited to spend the evening with my besty. As it turned out, it totally rocked, and I’m now a major TAB fan. Call it hippy, folksy, what you will. But those boys are filled with a light and have a way of kick drumming it into your soul. And who knew banjos could be so damn sexy? Ahem. Moving on…

I can be a vindictive bitch. In a yikes sort of way. No, it’s true. And I let it shine a couple times this last month, to a coworker and family, and although I relished the evil mah-ah-ah-ah “take that!” moments, in the end it felt so good to reconcile. Anger and hostility take so much more energy than acceptance and forgiveness and understanding (those whacky-weed words again). But it’s true. What a load off the heart to be kind instead. I decided I needed to start thinking positive and less smarmy in my own head and heart, not just wearing it on my face. It would save me from those snarky moments to begin with.

So, I’ll try to keep Dolly’s words (that’s “words,” boys) in mind each day, as a reminder.




Happy new year. Help me grow. Fertilize me. And I will fertilize you. Be kind, to yourself and to others...and don't forget the animals. (Puff Puff...Ima needin' somethin' munchy!)